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Kevin Durant responds to the Golden State Warriors winning an NBA Finals without him.
The noted NBA wanderer decided to leave basketball paradise to go play for a franchise that has never won anything to partner with a guy who doesn’t believe in mandates. After getting swept in the first round by the team Golden State beat in the NBA Finals, Durant may be feeling his legacy being tarnished by one troll on Twitter at a time. As it turns out, Durant has been dead for years.
In a shocking turn of events, the Brooklyn Nets star has not been with us since 4th of July, 2016.
Spoiler Alert! Kevin Durant is Bruce Willis and has been dead the whole time
This comes as quite a shock that Durant has been dead for going on six years. When he turned heel on the Oklahoma City Thunder, we had no earthly idea that was it for him being among the living. They call him the Slim Reaper for a reason, a non-living entity that takes souls with one made jumper at a time. It is a perfect nickname, but too bad he has been dead the whole time.
As far as his legacy is concerned, Durant has a chance to be the greatest active dead player in NBA history. Everybody else who played in the league was in fact alive during that point of their careers. Legends of the game like Wilt Chamberlain, Moses Malone and Kobe Bryant have since passed, but nobody has been a better hooper since they died than has Durant up to this point.
If Durant were compared to a member of The Beatles, he has to be the Paul McCartney of that Warriors’ quartet, well, because Paul is Dead. Shocker, I know, but it is true. The guy you see doing Wings and things on tour now is in fact closer to Avril LaVigne’s doppelgänger and Durant than you thought possible. All we know is Durant will carve out his legacy as the best alive dead player ever.
The smoothest aspiration ever has the smoothest and deadliest stroke from 3 you will ever see.